From October until November I feel like it was a haze, just to get back into a routine and back to life. I have never really asked for grace for any real reason in my life but during this time I did specifically ask a few people to just give me grace to get through my grief. I will be honest, I told god I was mad at him and asked why he was punishing me. I had done everything humanly possible to take care of myself and to care for my unborn child. And I was angry. After a few weeks I decided being angry wasn't doing me any good and that I needed to accept it. So lets Fast-forward now, in November I had a 3 month prescription of Birth control waiting on my dresser. I was offered a job as a Manager at Culvers . David and I made the choice to wait to try for a while before trying. The day before I started my new job I drove to my dads to visit with him and help my sister Amy move. As we sat down to eat a nice dinner my brother & his girlfriend abruptly announced they were expecting! I instantly thought I don’t know if I can be excited for anyone still! I drove home that night thinking about all the unexpected things god had been doing in my life. I got home and thought hmm.. When was I supposed to get my period?? So out of curiosity I thought I would take a at home test to make me feel better. After taking it a very faint line showed up positive! I looked at the date and saw it was Nov 25th, exactly 8 weeks from our miscarriage. I am guilty of doing the worst wife thing ever! I called my dad before anyone! He answered and I responded “ Isn't it got to be a record for 2 of your children to tell you in one day that they are expecting?!” He seemed a bit in shock! Then David showed up at home and I felt bad I hadn't done something cute to tell him, so I just blurted it out and he seemed ok with it… and he asked what I thought. I said honestly, I am scared. I could tell he was too! I said well we can only see what happens! We decided to not tell our family or children until Christmas. CAN YOU BELIEVE I HAD TO KEEP A SECRET FOR 4 WEEKS! It was killer! So here we are at 11 weeks along. Let me tell you this has been the worst pregnancy for morning sickness, dehydration, ect! I have went into the Er i would say 6 times since we found out we were pregnant. Most of it for being dizzy, sick, and a UTI. So far we have had 4 ultrasounds and we have a baby! =) We ask that everyone keep praying with us!! Thanks for reading this insanely long post!